Connect Back to Reality

Do you frequent social media sites? If so how long do you spend on these sites? Are you more fully engaged into the social media world or living in the present moment? While the intent of these sites is to allow us to connect to those in distant places and share aspects of our own lives they become a crutch and we become addicted to them. Each and everyday I see individuals buried in their phones ignoring family and friends everywhere because what is on their phones is “more important.” We are so adamant about being on our phones that we have forgotten how to interact with others face to face.

        When I was a kid the phone was only found in the home and cameras still had film that you had to take to the store and develop. I remember always wanting to go with my mom to pick up the pictures because I would wonder what the pictures would look like and the element of surprise was very exciting. Now we live in a world where we constantly take multiple pictures to “get our best shot”, and use filters which edits our every flaw. Our lives have gone from private and shared with our family and closest friends to extremely public to the point that anyone can complete a search on another individual and discover a variety of information. With a simple phone number and name, you can find out a large amount of information about another person you have never met.  While the intent of social media as mentioned is to connect us it actually is disconnecting us. Social media is also creating a society that is addicted to the validation that posts bring to them. Very often instead of posting something to share a memory individuals are posting on these platforms for the sole purpose to obtain likes, comments, and the positive validation that these bring. Don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with sharing a memory however a problem exists when posts are for the sole purpose of validation. Ten years ago when social media sites were just in their earliest form no one would think to share photos of their daily lives or meals however this is a reality and a constant in our daily lives.

In addition to the problem of validation for the individual who is posting, a problem also exists for the individual on the other side of the screen. While it is a common knowledge that posts are a false reality of an individual’s actual life, this illusion of a perfect reality creates a world were individuals compare themselves to others and judge their own self-worth based upon others successes. Comparison can create a negative sense of self- esteem, and feelings of failure in life that a person in not at the point in life that they are supposed to be at based upon where others are in their lives. Countless study have found a correlation between comparison that individuals make between others and themselves on social media sites. A study by Primack et al. (2017) found that there was linear associations between the number of social media platforms that were used and both anxiety and depression. Furthermore, for individuals who had more social media platforms specifically seven to eleven this odd increased.  It is interesting that something which was meant to connect us would actually be contributing negatively to our mental health.

Do likes really matter? See the beauty in each and everyday.

Something needs to be done about this problem about oversharing for validation and comparison from the viewer.  While we will never go back to the time before social media existed I wish we could do something like it. At this point in time all that can be done is a social media detox and time dedicated to actual interactions between friends and family. At the end of the day the question can be posed, what is more important millions of likes and friends on social media or lasting meaningful connections with others in real life?

 Please enjoy this classic song by Simon and Garfunkel which highlights the problem we face today.

Reference

Primack, B.A., Shensa, A., Escobar-Viera, C,G., Barrett, E.L., Sidani, J.E., Colditz, J.B., James, E. (2017). Use of multiple social media platforms and symptoms of depression and anxiety: A nationally-representative study among U.S. young adults. Computers in Human Behavior, 69, 1-9.