Did you ever want something so much
and it just didn’t work out? The past couple months has been a whirlwind of
stress, I can honestly say I have been on a never ending roller coaster full of
highs, lows, multiples joy, as well as
heartbreak. I received a call from a certain hospital and they offered me a
job! Ever since I received the job offer I was on a mission to start my new
life, I planned out this life and made it my mission to achieve this goal and
to work at this dream facility. Since the time of the job offer, I created a
plan and studied nonstop for 2 months, my test date came and I passed in 75
questions…something I never thought I was going to do. Ever since I passed I thought
that the life I planned was going to actually happen! I celebrated, went to the
place I would then reside in, paid money, and then two days later I got another
call from the board… a technicality was going to prevent me from starting this
new life. I was devastated the life that I planned and aspired to have two
months earlier just crumbled as if a wrecking ball slammed into a building.
After my initial shock and devastation I was angry because I was perfectly
qualified however this technicality would prevent me from starting my new life.
As the weeks went by it slowly got easier however it still hurts and I still
question why this occurred. I was so close, and at the last minute plans changed,
I still do not understand why this occurred but it has. In this situation
timing is everything, I had to get everything done by a certain time so due to
this deadline I made it my goal to pass my boards and start working at this facility,
as I mentioned above I studied nonstop for two months, I passed my boards with
the minimum amount of questions and did all that I could in my power to
complete everything on time. The only thing that prevented me from attaining my
goal was timing. This led me to question why this timing was not on my side, I may
not know this now or ever understand why it didn’t work out for me now but I
know it will eventually work out for me.
Although this sound like a sad
story it has allowed me to gain so much including:
1) It allowed me to understand that I am stronger
than I ever thought I could be
2) It allowed me to see that I should not doubt my
abilities or question my intelligence
3) It allowed me to develop new friendship and gain
family I never knew I had
Overall although it is one of the
hardest losses I have ever had to experience it showed me that despite my
desire to be in control I have to learn to let go and allow myself to follow G-ds
timing in everything. I may never know why this did not work out from me now
because it is not the right time, my time will come although I will not know
exactly when this is. Perhaps it is in 3 months, perhaps it is in 6 months or
even a year from now. When it is the right time, everything will work out.
Timing is everything and I will become all that I want to be I just may need to
wait for awhile.
Was there ever a time where the
timing was not ideal and you lost something? I would love to hear your
stories!!
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